Going That Extra Mile
If you were fortunate like me to have a loving mother who was full of wisdom and often entertained me with her unassuming comments, you will enjoy this article. It was sent to me by a friend, almost two decades ago and the author is unknown. If you are a senior and lived in the 50s and 60s like I did, you might remember some of these amusing comments.
1. My mother taught me about weather. “This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
2. My mother taught me to appreciate a job well done. “If you are going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
3. My mother taught me religion, “You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
4. My mother taught me about stamina. “You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
5. My mother taught me foresight. “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
6. My mother taught me logic. “Because I said so, that’s why.”
7. My mother taught me more logic. “If you fall out of that tree and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”
8. My mother taught me humor. “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
9. My mother taught me about my roots. “Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
10. My mother taught me irony. “Keep crying and I will give you something to cry about.”
11. My mother taught me about contortionism. “Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck.”
12. My mother taught me about hypocrisy. “If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times, don’t exaggerate.”
13. My mother taught me about envy. “There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”
14. My mother taught me wisdom. “When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”
15. My mother taught me how to become an adult. “If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
16. My mother taught me about anticipation. “Just wait until we get home!”
17. My mother taught me medical science. “If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”
18. My mother taught me about ESP. “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
19. My mother taught me about osmosis. “Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
Until next time, appreciate and enjoy your mother while you can.
Lawrence King, Director of Education
Chaparral Community Association
