Antiquated Clockish Terminology

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“It’s quarter to two.” For those too young to remember herds of bison roaming freely in what is now Fish Creek Park, this may be hard to understand. In this context, a quarter is 25 cents worth of time at a dollar an hour. There are not 100 minutes in an hour, as time has not yet been metricated, so 15 minutes must pass before it is two o’clock. Another 15 minutes and it will be quarter after two.

Time moves around the perimeter of a circle at different rates of speed, faster when measuring a minute, even faster for a second, more slowly for an hour. For some reason, there’s a sprightly big hand and a sluggish little hand. Time always moves in a clockwise direction. Counterclockwise would be unwise. Can you guess which way is which?

A technically detailed explanation of this sophisticated concept of time-telling would fill several pages, so let’s settle for “It’s 1:45 p.m.” Clear enough. As long as you know what p.m. stands for! What is a meridiem as distinct from a meridian? O forget it! No time, time, time for silly stuff, stuff, stuff like this, this, this!